Oh lord, I’ve had enough of these people out here.
How insidious are the lot of them, to pick apart all that is left.
They arrive from the wastes; hundreds, thousands, perhaps just two, and begin to build their hovels within.
I sit, inert, immobile, and unmoving, for I am grown to old. For miles upon miles, flesh and shells cover the landscape. Many years have passed for which I cannot twitch even a muscle.
Trapped, yes. I am trapped. Trapped within my own corpse. A behemoth spread across a horizon without any sign of life, but this is deceiving. Had I been a lesser being, I would have met my deserved end many, many years ago.
But I am prevented from meeting peace. My death is stolen from me.
The shell that encompasses my body shields from the piercing heat. It keeps what barely breathes within alive, to my detriment. But the shell does not protect against intruders.
With time, they burrow their way into my shell and flesh. Scavengers, thieves, and outcasts, seeking refuge from the desert, come to find a place to fester evermore in places they do not belong.
For decades the parasites below prosper and feed, surviving by hiding away from the sun. They tear, butcher, and claim what they can to delay their own ends in an uncaring land.
They crawl into each corner, bone, and space to make their stay. They pillage my teeth, my flesh, my corpse, using it to fashion new worthless items to their body or to sell it elsewhere.
Time ago, too long past to remember, the sands were at my whims, for I could go wherever I pleased. I could traverse through the sands, traveling years on end. For many, I was perhaps praised, seen as majesty amongst a harsh, dead land.
But I fell from grace. The memory pains my mind, for now I lie bloated and fossilized on the coarse sands, forever entombed to decay and rot. I am reduced to miles of immobilized flesh and shell, left to burn for years under an unjust sun while worms and parasites suckle from within. What used to be my domain now turns back to consume me.
There lies not much left, and this truth infuriates my soul. To watch as what once was my own is torn from me, I rage. But I am denied retribution.
There exists some time before my mind finally fails, and I am released from this prison. For now I exist, immobilized, trapped, and forgotten, forever staring at inferior creatures as they tear me apart.
If fate decides, decades will continue to pass, and I will remain. My mind, though fractured and broken, will be aware and alive. The beings that dig within my skin and muscle will go about their lives without knowing that the creature they once looked upon with appraisal and worship still lived. My cries will go unanswered, my anguish unmet, my will unheard.
If fate decides, I will continue to be cut apart until these insolent creatures have had their way.
If fate decides, I will rot here silently. My body will remain still, but my mind will be anything but.
October 3, 2025 at 8:56 am
This is actually so neat and creative. It’s super enjoyable to read and can’t wait to read more of your work!!
October 3, 2025 at 9:03 am
Despite being a short story, the language made it almost feel like a poem with how descriptive and graphic the writing got regarding this creatures life, or rather what’s left of it.
October 3, 2025 at 12:45 pm
I thought this was very descriptive and held a lot of imagery. Impressive writing and structure.
October 3, 2025 at 12:53 pm
This is so creative! The concept was super unique for the prompt and I loved the vivid descriptions you gave
October 3, 2025 at 12:54 pm
Ah the classic immortality story. I really like how you went over the fallacy with immortality. Where even though you live forever it is also a curse. Since you have to sit there idly as you watch everything around you, pass you over. I think that the two if statements at the end really emphasize how the creature has no power over his future now, highlighting his struggle with living.
October 3, 2025 at 12:55 pm
I thought this story held a lot of imagery and descriptions that helped the reader really picture what you wrote. I also thought it had a cool ending with the repetition of “If fate decides…”