“We’ve never done anything together that I’ve actually cared about,” Tony says to me, cutting me off from my sentence. Tears welled up in my eyes and spilled over, tracing wet paths down my cheeks. I wasn’t so much sad as I was angry. Tony and I had been together for 2 years, and we were going strong. Never once had I felt like he didn’t care about the things that we did together; he always seemed genuinely happy to be with me, laughing, smiling, and always showering me with compliments. More often than not, he was the one who suggested the activities we shared. I look at him with a face of disgust.
“What are you even talking about?” I snap at him. My voice trembling with disbelief. That stupid, smug look on his face was driving me crazy.
“I mean it. Everything we’ve done together means nothing to me. I dont care about you, Merissa.” His words smack me right across the face, but instead of breaking, I laugh bitter and sharp.
“You’ve got to be kidding,” I say, voice breaking, but fierce. He just shrugs like he doesn’t even care. But in his eyes, I catch a flicker. Of what? I can’t tell. uncertainty? Regret?
“I dont know, it’s hard to explain,” he mutters.
“Hard to explain?” I hiss, stepping closer, my anger boiling over. “What on earth is so hard to explain?”
“I’ve just… lost feelings,” he muttered, avoiding my gaze. His face was tight, like he was hiding something from me, something heavy.
“You’re hiding something and I know it,” I said, voice breaking as tears of anger streamed down my cheeks. “Are you seeing someone else?” He blinked, caught off guard, then looked away again, nervously rubbing his arm like he wished he could just disappear.
“I knew it.” I spat, my heart shattering into a million pieces. “Why else would you just lose feelings out of nowhere? After two years of what I thought was a healthy relationship?”
He swallowed hard. “I didn’t mean to, Merissa, I got blacked out drunk at the frat party… I didn’t know what I was doing. But yeah, I caught feelings for her,” he said. It was ridiculous. I’d told him not to go to that party, his first ever, because I couldn’t be there with him. I had plans that weekend down in Portland, and I begged him not to go alone, knowing exactly how this could happen. Of course I had to let him go because I can’t control him, but I told him that I was gonna trust him to be safe and make good choices.
“I trusted you to make good choices, to not mess around with other girls. I told you this, Tony, and you promised me.” My voice cracked, the pain cutting through every word.
“Yeah, I know, Merissa, I told you that I got too drunk, I couldn’t control myself.” He said, voice barely steady.
“You know damn well that drinking like that only leads to disaster. You could’ve chosen not to drink, not to get tangled up in all that. But it doesn’t even seem like you tried to be loyal.” I told him, shaking my head.
“I know I messed up, Merissa, but please just let me make it right.” He begged, desperation bleeding into his voice.
“No, Tony. I’m done. You shattered my trust, and I want nothing to do with you anymore. Your behavior is disgusting. Go be with that other girl you fell for, maybe she’ll let you live your reckless life, doing whatever you want with whoever you want.” I grabbed my things and stormed out, slamming the door behind me, the sound echoing the last words of my decision.