“I low-key want to thrift it this year. I mean, it’s just such an expensive tradition, like it’s literally just pajama pants, why do they have to be $40 per set?”

“Why not? I mean, as long as you’re able to find some decently cute ones that aren’t well-used, you should go right ahead.”

“I guess you’re right. I don’t think I’ll tell him that they’re thrifted, though; he gets so stuck up about clothes and such; he thinks any clothes worn by someone else are disgusting, I swear. He’s ridiculous.” I begin combing through the pajama pants section of the Goodwill mindlessly. I run my hands across the ugly patterns of cats and dogs, slightly parting the hangers so that I don’t miss any as I go. Occasionally, I’d stop to look at a pair that had potential and just start thinking about all the expensive gifts that he’s going to get me for Christmas. I just wish I could spend just as much on him. Kaylee definitely noticed that my aura changed because she came over and started yapping about some drama going on with the guys at her work to get my mind off of it. She’s the best.

“You know, Annie, instead of getting these cheap ones from here, why don’t we find a way to make a little extra money for you?”

“How, I mean, I already have a job, like what else can I do?”

“Hear me out: it’s winter, and what do people want when they’re cold? Hot chocolate! We’re young, and you’re cute, so people will definitely buy from us. The only question is, where would we set it up?

“We can’t do it in public unless we have a permit, can’t do it at school without some cause, what about your house? You live on a busy street, and we could pair it with chocolate chip cookies and charge $1.50 each! That’s easy profit considering hot cocoa is like $5 for a big can, and with some milk and marshmallows it won’t be much more.”

“I mean, I guess, but do you think people will really stop? I just don’t know.”

I think they would, we could advertise it on our Instagrams and snaps so all our friends would come by and hang out! We have to, it would be so much fun!”

“Kaylee, we’re seniors, you really don’t think we’re just a LITTLE too old for this?”

“Never, just let me know when it’s happening because you don’t have a choice.”

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“I can’t believe we’re actually doing this. I feel like I’m ten again.”

“It’ll be fine, all we have to do is sit here for a couple of hours!” Now, to say it bluntly, this was the most boring “couple of hours” I’ve ever spent. We sat there freezing and alone for SO long. But in the end, I suppose it was worth it. I made around $90 in three hours of work, which is certainly enough to cover the cost of a couple of pairs of PJs. Now, finally, for the hard part, I decided what my boyfriend would actually want to wear. He already has a couple of different colors of plaid bottoms, so I want to steer away from those.

It took me what seemed like forever to finally decide on a pair. I was texting all of my friends and asking their opinions, but I finally landed on a nice pair of matching fluffy ones that had a bunch of little bows on mine and a bunch of little weights on his. They were perfect.

When I gave them to him, he was so happy, he put them on immediately, and we wore them all night.

I just remember the look in his eyes when I was taking a picture of us with our new matching sets and how perfect that moment was. The warmth in his smile just made my night so much better.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————-

I knew that Annie would get me PJs for Christmas, but God does it bring me back. She makes me feel like such a child, like I’m back sitting on the couch with my family, back when my feet didn’t reach the floor. She doesn’t even realize how much these little things mean to me. My family never did any of those stupid traditions, and I don’t either, well, I didn’t until Annie came along. I always thought Christmas was so overrated that it was fake and full of forced smiles. I wouldn’t say I was all too enthusiastic about this new tradition, but she looks so happy when she’s giving me gifts, I literally can’t say no. She thinks I’m “stuck in my ways,” which might be partially true, but I guess I just lost that Christmas spark at such a young age; I just feel like traditions are pointless now that I’m older. But I try to be optimistic because I know she puts a lot of thought into it, and it makes her happy. It makes a part of me sad, I think, knowing that my family never cared to do anything like that; it just hurts. Our Christmases were always kind of dull. Not icing her out when she’s trying to give me that spark is just so difficult. She’s always trying to watch movies and bake cookies and do all the things, but that’s just not me, and I don’t know how to get her to understand that. But maybe one day I’ll tell her, I’d tell her everything, about my family’s Christmas past, about why I feel like this. I just don’t even know where I’d start. I don’t have the words to say because they would surely crush her spirit. I just don’t know if I could do that. Maybe, just not yet.